Friday, May 18, 2012

I Can't Do This

I know, anyone's first response to this post will be "you've only been doing this for a week and a half, you'll get used to it", but...  I won't.  I can tell that I won't.

A friend of mine is leaving his position as network admin/system admin at a small wireless ISP in rural Virginia, and is training me to be his replacement.  I signed on because hey, any income is better than no income, and lol I can work with internets.

Now, if you know me, you know I'm just not a morning person at all.  Unrestricted by employment hours or anything else, I go to sleep at around 4-7 AM and wake up sometime in the afternoon.  I've found that I begin to get my daily energy anytime between 2 and 4 PM.  This reaches its peak an hour or two before midnight at the earliest.

That last paragraph is relevant because I currently am having to get up at 8 AM to have enough time to shower, get dressed, and eat before having maybe 25-30 minutes of leisure time before having to drive 14 miles from my house to where the ISP is, by 10 AM.  It takes almost half an hour to get there, and I don't have a key to let myself in so I have to wait for someone else to arrive.  Lunch is at noon, or just after the boss leaves, whichever is later.

The part-time "quitting time" is 2 PM, but I usually stick around working on shit for at least another few hours, and leave no later than 6 PM.  The job is technically going to be part-time, since it's a rather small company and we're still deploying the wireless infrastructure necessary to be able to have customers in the future, which involves a ton of red tape as we try and get permission to put up antennas in various places.

Then I have that same 14 mile, almost-half-hour-long drive back home.

So, at this point, it's anywhere between 5 and 6:30 PM.  Have leisure time if it's before 6, then eat.  Now it's pretty much going to be 7 PM.  I now have 4-5 hours to try and fill with entertainment to the best of my ability before I have to go to sleep.  Which, if you read the third paragraph, you realize I'm pretty much right at my energy peak when I have to go to sleep.  Like right now, for instance.  Also, there's an extra level of crap for yesterday and today (contrary to popular belief, it becomes a new day at midnight, not when you go to sleep or wake up (I get into arguments with people about this (RRG))) because my parents are on their annual anniversary vacation and I have to take care of the dog, which means feeding her around 5 AM and 5 PM, and taking her out to use the yard a few times daily.

Now, I'm really only a self-described sleep schedule expert, but...  that can't be good for a person.  Going to sleep every day right when your body is at its energy peak, that is.  In the past, when I did summer internships where my dad works, which were full-time, I experienced a huge amount of stress that a weekend's worth of basically doing nothing could not relieve.  So basically, it's less of a physical "can't be good for a person" and more of a mental "can't be good for a person".

Now of course, if I can manage to remember my fucking login details during the drive home, I can always pick a day and VPN in to do stuff.  Then I can work on my own schedule.  The problem with this is, I don't think the boss would really like it if he hires me, I get my VPN credentials, and then he never sees me again.  He's pretty funny, but he's still the kind of guy that wants to see the people that work for him most of the time he's at work.

Hence, my problem.  Is there a job available anywhere (anywhere) that I can hold given that I want to get up in the late morning (10 AM) at the earliest, work until 5 or 6 PM, and then have my whole night to spend before going to sleep around 2 AM?  I think I could maintain that schedule without any kind of mental stress.  But I've been on this one for a week and a half and it's already driving me crazy.  When you look at that, I'm really only asking for a shift of two hours in work schedule, but those two hours would basically make all the difference to me.

The other issue is, I'm fairly certain that my friend thinks I can do a lot more of this shit than I feel I'm capable of.  I'm up to the challenge, which is why I'm staying on, but...  I can't shake this nagging feeling that everything's going to go to shit as soon as he leaves.  The boss kind of needs some parts of his job done for him at certain points and is rather insistent about some of the weirdest things, and I'm not nearly assertive enough to handle that.  Even worse, I don't think I could train anyone to replace me and have it go nearly as well as my training is going currently, because my friend knows his shit, and it's not his fault that portions of it aren't sticking in my brain at all.

So what do I do, /b/?  Dilemma, thy name is employment for a nocturnal man.

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