The Radio Around Here Sucks

I've mentioned it in the past, and more recently begun dodging around it somewhat, but it's already out there: I live in Charlottesville, VA.  It's kind of a dump to be honest, the only real attractions are the historical landmarks.  Driving around here, it's inevitable that you're going to be listening to the radio.  Honestly, it's usually fine, but occasionally there's just the perfect storm of shit that absolutely ruins your drive.  I'm here to break down the experience I had today going out and filling up my gas tank.

97.5 3WV (WWWV)

This is what the radio's usually tuned to, because most of my driving is at night and they play long sets of classic rock at that point.  I get in the car and turn it on, and hear some classic rock.  Okay, I turn it up and get going.  A few minutes later the song ends and I'm thinking "okay, this is just gonna be commercials or something and then another song", but no.  3WV, despite having the tagline "Everything that rocks", is talking about something relating to Coldplay.  Except they can't just say "hey, there's this Coldplay thing that's happening, now back to music that's infinitely better than Coldplay!", no, they have to make jokes and talk about Gwyneth Paltrow and then play some interview with Gwyneth Paltrow.  So, whatever, I switch stations.

106.1 The Corner (WCNR)

True to their tagline, "Different is good", I'm now listening to something I've never heard before.  Whatever, it's got a good sound, so I go with it.  It's around this point that I get to the gas station, so off goes the car (and thus the radio).  After filling up and bitching about how the Kangaroo station never puts receipt tape in their pumps, I'm back on the road to come home.  Now it's some hipster bullshit with autotune and synth instruments.  I listen to it for a while, I honestly don't know why.  I later switch stations.

92.3 Rock Hits (WXRK)

...or so I thought.  A station that's normally a good bet also happens to be playing hipster bullshit.  Let's see if 3WV has finished talking about Gwyneth Paltrow yet...

97.5 3WV (WWWV)

...and now they're talking about Ronald McDonald.  YOUR STATION'S TAGLINE IS "EVERYTHING THAT ROCKS".  YOUR DJ TALKING ABOUT RANDOM SHIT DOESN'T ROCK.  PLAY SOME GODDAMN MUSIC BITCH.  MUSIC IS WHAT ROCKS.  YOUR DJ IS A SACK OF SHIT AND I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT HIS OPINIONS.

End

Luckily, that happened just as I pulled up to the house, so I just turned off the car and went inside.

Charlottesville, you disappoint me.